I need to figure out how to be superwoman.
I have always loved having a million things to do all the time. And I became, I think thought humbly so, very good at balancing all of them. But since being pregnant, I have felt a deep desire to say NO to most things. And I have been, proudly. And to the astonishment of my husband.
But I may have gone too far. I find myself wasting my days reading useless internet pages and compulsively checking Facebook (for what, I don’t even know). I have plenty to do, but I have very little structure unless I make it for myself, which makes it hard for me to even do the little I have do to, much less anything else.
And I’ve been so looking forward to this free time. I just don’t know what to do with free time.
Tonight I went to a meeting called my the new Berks Arts Council Director. He has an idea to create a fringe festival in Berks County. It was very, very exciting to be in a room of mostly community theatre folks who are interested in thinking outside of the proverbial box and making great art happen here.
And, as I am the Artistic Director of the Reading Theater Project (more on this another day…), I am eager to be involved. And I’m having a baby in 2-3 months, which is another thing I have been eager to do for a while. And writing this children’s play I received a grant to do. And other work (teaching arts-in-education, running the Religious School, teaching yoga).
Hence, the need to figure out how to be superwoman. Balance of self and family. Difficult, but a necessity. I don’t think I can function well otherwise.